movie review – Page 3 – The Magnificent 60s

Rio Conchos (1964) ***

Starts and ends as a rootin’-tootin’ western but sags badly in between. The chance of turning it into The Magnificent Four or even The Dirty Pair go a-begging and it’s both revenge- and redemption-driven without either taking enough precedent. And there’s a curious dynamic in that the murderers are clearly smarter than the soldiers. Set in the aftermath of the Civil War, it’s engaging enough but too episodic and far short of a classic.

Lassiter (Richard Boone) kills Apaches with brutal efficiency in revenge for losing wife and child to them. But there’s no law against murdering Native Americans, not even when they form a harmless burial party, and when arrested by Captain Haven (Stuart Whitman) it’s for buying a stolen rifle, part of a consignment of 2,000 feared to be heading into the hands of the Apaches and a rogue Confederate Col Pardee (Edmond O’Brien), under whom Lassiter once served.

Charged with going undercover to get the weapons back is Haven, who lost the cargo in the first place, and another soldier Franklyn (Jim Brown), posing as gunpowder salesmen. Lassiter is freed from jail along with exceptionally vain murderer Rodriguez (Anthony Franciosa). From captured Apache Sally (Wende Wagner) they discover the Apaches are hooking up three days hence with Pardee in Rio Conchos in Mexico.

Mostly, it’s tension between the soldiers and their captives-turned-colleagues. There’s an incident with a dead baby at a house attacked by Apaches, Lassiter shooting the tortured mother. Lassiter attacks a saloon keeper for refusing to serve Franklyn. Pardee is building an army to re-start the war. There’s a brutal scene of the men being dragged behind horses. While Haven plans to use the gunpowder to blow up the Apaches and/or the rifles, Lassiter and Rodriguez nurture plans to steal the cargo.

Lassiter is pretty smart, twice outwitting the Apaches by using fire as a distracting device, easily getting the better of Haven and more than a match for the duplicitous Rodriguez. But there’s a powder keg waiting to explode in more ways than one, the chances of Lassiter toadying along to Apaches seeming remote.

Richard Boone (Night of the Following Day, 1969) coming off Have Gun –Will Travel (1957-9163) and The Richard Boone Show (1963-1964) is impressive as the wily renegade. Here’s one of those actors you never quite know what he’s going to do and that unpredictability adds continuous tension, but it would probably have helped if the audience was fully filled in on his intentions, rather than being surprised all the time. Given he was the star here, he was allotted time to be seen making up his mind in various situations, something he would be denied as a later supporting actor. So when there’s not really much going, he creates tension.

Stuart Whitman (Sands of the Kalahari, 1965) doesn’t really have enough to do what with Boone’s character always being one step ahead and clearly more attuned to danger. Anthony Franciosa (Fathom, 1967) has a gem of role, adding to his characterization with little bits of scene-stealing business, sharpening a knife on a wagon wheel, recovering a knife from the stomach of a victim being dragged away by a horse, snaffling a packet of cigarettes, and never ceasing to admire his attraction to women.

Jim Brown (The Split, 1968) makes a solid movie debut, offering more by his presence than in action terms since for the most part he is just the sidekick. Wende Wagner (Guns of the Magnificent Seven, 1969) has more screen time but mostly just smolders or looks sullen apart from a nice scene mourning the baby and another defying her tribe. Look out for Edmond O’Brien (The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance, 1962) and silent child actor Warner Anderson.

The action sequences are well done and director Gordon Douglas (Robin and the Seven Hoods, 1964) also deserves credit for allowing Boone such scope while the opening scene and the death of the unseen woman are exceptional. He has a great gift for the widescreen, but the movie could have done with more clarity. It’s not his fault the poster was misleading and led me into the picture with different expectations. The screenplay by Joseph Landon (Von Ryan’s Express, 1965) and Clair Huffaker (The War Wagon, 1967) was based on the latter’s book.

The Shuttered Room (1967) ***

More Straw Dogs (1971) than The Old Dark House (1963) with for good measure a side helping of Bad Day at Black Rock (1955) thrown in. After a super menacing opening, a sustained sense of threat is all the fuel we get to keep the story going, the horror elements kept at bay as much as the creature imprisoned behind the titular room in a mill.

The mill’s long since been abandoned since Susannah (Carol Lynley) spent a terrifying night there as a child when the creature broke out and had to be battered into submission by Susannah’s Aunt Agatha (Flora Robson). The mill’s on a remote island and Susannah’s back aged 21 to claim her inheritance. Only trouble is her cousin Ethan (Oliver Reed) thinks he tops the line of succession to inherit the tumbledown building.

Although her uncle is long dead, her aunt lives in a tower complete with hawk and strides around in the kind of black cape previously assigned to vampires. The mill’s still got a reputation, a local worker blinded and disfigured after being attacked by a fire-breathing demon. Susannah and husband Mike (Gig Young) have the idea of turning the mill into a summer home and have come by to try it out, though Susannah’s dormant fears keep spilling over.

So while we’re waiting to either the creature to break out again or for Susannah, in the manner of all foolish heroines, to trot up the stairs and push through the door, it’s up to Ethan and his gang to attempt to terrorize the couple. Clearly never being educated about incest, Ethan sets his heart on carnal relations with cousin Susannah.

If only he could get Mike out of the way. Trouble is Mike isn’t as meek as he looks and like Spencer Tracy in Bad Day at Black Rock he’s got all those tricky karate moves so that when Ethan comes after him it’s the local who ends up in the river.

But Ethan’s got a cunning plan and sets up an ambush. The gang block the road with their truck and when Mike gets out of his car to investigate is hog-bound in a fishing net, receiving a few more traditional punches to boot. To pass the time the gang commandeers his vehicle and race up to their bound captive, braking just in time.

Meanwhile, Ethan is pursuing Deborah through the mill, intent on rape. Although she manages to humiliate him by calling his bluff that just enrages him and his rage intensifies. It’s still unclear how/why the creature escaped but we know it’s on the loose because it’s previously despatched a local girl who sneaked into the mill to steal Susannah’s nylons.

So while Mike manages to escape the thugs and hit them with some more karate chops, Susannah doesn’t really need his help, the creature coming to the rescue. Beyond the creature being her sister, there’s no further explanation for her imprisonment. There is a (kind of) shock ending.

The main problem is this looks as if it’s been filmed without any rehearsal, as if the actors have been hired for their previous roles. It’s no stretch for Carol Lynley (Bunny Lake Is Missing, 1965) to come across as a somewhat vacuous blonde. Menace is Oliver Reed’s (Hannibal Brooks, 1968) middle name and Gig Young (That Touch of Mink, 1962) has always got by on a certain easy charm though the chop-suey came as a surprise.

The real achievement from director David Greene, in his debut, is to get away without much real horror. By now H.P. Lovecraft was major source of horror. This was the fourth movie out of five in the 1960s drawn from his portfolio. In the current century there’s been no shortage of adaptations. Despite the lack of genuine horror, the other ingredients make up

The Best House in London (1969) *

One of the worst – and certainly among the most repellent – films ever made. A hymn to misogyny under the guise of the not very difficult task of exposing Victorian hypocrisy, it labors under the bizarre thesis that all women want to be prostitutes. Screenwriter Denis Norden’s befuddled sense of history is awash with the same kind of contempt for audiences. Elizabeth Barrett (of Wimpole St fame) rubs shoulders with Lord Alfred Douglas (Oscar Wilde’s illicit lover) even though they lived half a century apart, the Chinese Opium Wars and The Indian Mutiny feature despite being separated by 15 years.

Sex workers had proved the basis for many good (and occasionally excellent) pictures in the 1960s ranging from Butterfield 8, Never on Sunday, Irma la Douce and Go Naked in the World at the start of the decade to Midnight Cowboy at its end, but these all featured well-rounded characters facing understandable dilemmas. But here the cynical and demeaning plot – more Carry On Up the Brothel than political satire – makes you wonder how this concept was perceived as either plausible or an acceptable subject for comedy

*The monocle joke*. *Dany Robin sports the manacles her idiotic girls were supposed to wear rather the monocles they did wear.*

Feminist philanthropist Josephine Pacefoot (Joanna Pettet) – a character based on the real-life campaigner Josephine Butler – has set up the Social Purity League to rescue fallen women. Walter Leybourne (David Hemmings) is hired as a publicist to bring the issues raised to a wider audience. When Josephine inherits the fortune of Uncle Francis (George Sanders) the pair come up against the nefarious Benjamin Oakes (also played by Hemmings), her cousin and his half-brother, who has purloined his uncle’s mansion in Belgravia as the premises for London’s first brothel – The Libertine Club. This venture is backed by the Home Secretary (John Bird) as a way of getting streetwalkers away from upmarket shopping streets where their presence discourages wealthy females. Josephine also has to deal with a caricatured “evil” Chinaman (Wolfe Morris) through her uncle’s investment in opium. There’s also for no particular reason apoplectic airship inventor Count Pandolfo (Warren Mitchell).

All the women rescued from the oldest profession by Josephine are soon recruited by Oakes and a good chunk of the middle section of the movie involves various excuses to give the viewers intimate glimpses of what goes on in the brothel, involving an abundance of nudity. Oakes also aims to seduce Josephine while the shy Walter struggles to entice her into romance.

Excepting Josephine and Oakes’ mistress Babette (Dany Robin), the women are uniformly stupid. The story begins with Oakes’ duping a woman in a hot air balloon into removing her clothes on the grounds that it was the only way to reduce height enough to land. And it does not get any better. Women supposedly forced onto the streets after bad experiences with men turn out to be the seducers. Walter has the devil’s own job getting any of the girls to agree they had been raped. Walter, hoping to sell a story to The Times, is no less crass: “I can get five columns for a good rape.” Flora (Carol Friday), rescued much to her displeasure, is “gagging” for it. And there’s just an awful scene where a young girl sings about her “pussy” which even in the 1960s surely raised adverse comment.

The humor is largely of the sniggering variety. The brothel girls wear monocles instead of manacles, the only game on display in the Card Room is strip poker, and naturally there is a peeping tom, lawyer Sylvester (Willie Rushton).

As if to display his erudition, but without raising the laughter quotient, Norden chucks in literary cameos by the score – Charles Dickens (Arnold Diamond), Alfred Lord Tennyson (Hugh Burden), the aforementioned Elizabeth Barrett (Suzanne Hunt) and Lord Alfred Douglas (George Reynolds), Sherlock Holmes (Peter Jeffrey) and Dr Watson (Thorley Walters), plus explorer David Livingstone (Neil Arden) and department store entrepreneurs Fortnum (Arthur Howard) and Mason (Clement Freud).

That the movie actually gets one star is thanks to a number of excellent visual jokes: one scene of Uncle Francis defying the mutineers by raising the Union Jack cuts to the blood-splattered flag decorating his coffin; Sylvester frustrated at the keyhole but still hearing the moans of seducer-in-chief Oakes is followed by the sight of the wannabe lover struggling to get out of his bonds, having been attacked by Chinamen.

There’s not much difference, beyond hair color, between the characters essayed by David Hemmings (Alfred the Great, 1969). Both are one-dimensional, the pop-eyed virgin astonished by the goings-on at the brothel, the suave villain who might as well be twirling his moustache for all the depth he brings to the role. Thankfully, Joanna Pettet (Blue, 1968) is at least believable though even she could not act her way out of scenes where she was suspended by the Chinaman above a vat of boiling acid.

George Sanders (Sumuru, Queen of Femina aka The Girl from Rio, 1969) has a ball as the hypocrite-in-chief who knows how to monetize vice while Dany Robin (Topaz, 1969) brings some finesse to an otherwise one-dimensional part. But everyone else is a cipher which is a shame given the talent on show – John Bird (A Dandy in Aspic, 1968), John Cleese (A Fish Called Wanda, 1988), Warren Mitchell (The Assassination Bureau, 1969), Bill Fraser (Masquerade, 1965) and Maurice Denham (Some Girls Do, 1969). Among the girls, you might spot Veronica Carlsen (Dracula Has Risen from the Grave, 1968) , Margaret Nolan (Goldfinger, 1964) and Rose Alba (Thunderball, 1965).

Director Philip Saville (Oedipus the King, 1968) should have known better and certainly made amends later in his career with among other projects BBC series Boys from the Blackstuff (1982). But Denis Norden (Buona Sera, Mrs Campbell, 1968) never wrote a more misguided piece in all his life.

For sure, a film like this is not going to do down well in these times but I was surprised how vilified it was on release, critics like Roger Ebert insulted by its endless attacks on women, the public no less hostile and it died a death at the box office.

American Gangster (2007) *****

I’ve seen this more times than The Godfather (1972) and The Godfather Part II (1974) put together, so, for me, yeah, this is the greatest gangster picture of all time. There’s always a snobbery involved in talking about your all-time favorite picture. In discussions, I often find that the movie people consider the best is rarely the one they watch the most. While I adore both Godfather pictures on an academic level, they now seem a haul, especially with the running time, overtly grandiose.

American Gangster, on the other hand, is fleet of foot. The dual storylines – Black gangster Frank Lucas (Denzel Washington) rising to the top, incorruptible cop Ritchie Roberts (Russell Crowe) heading a team targeting New York’s drug kingpins – neatly intersect until nearly the end.

Director Ridley Scott has thrown off the shackles of sci fi and history – the demands of the grandiose and the visually cinematic and (in the sci fi) the problems of finding a new way to tell the Alien tale when the audience is waiting for the gore. Here he concentrates on narrative that, seemingly at every turn, exposes character. The story is a fascinating one at that. Nobody in law enforcement or at the higher echelons of Government went after Frank Lucas because nobody thought a Black gangster could build an empire to which even the Mafia kowtowed.

Oddly enough, the violence is muted. Scott does away with the need for repeated violence by an opening shot that sets the scene, Lucas setting fire to a snitch. This is more of a story about big business, that entrepreneurial spirit by which America sets so much store. And it’s a story about family. Lucas recruits all his brothers for the enterprise. Roberts is an outcast in the family of cops because he refuses to be corrupted.

But Roberts is no saint. He is accused by wife Laurie (Carla Gugino) of being scrupulously honest on that front only so he can be dishonest in the rest of his life, with his promiscuity and neglect of his son. When Lucas has the entire extended family round the table to celebrate Xmas (or Thanksgiving – there’s turkey involved, that’s all I know) in a mansion, Roberts is reduced to a tuna sandwich in his cramped apartment.

This is a time when gangsters were celebrities, safe in the knowledge that they were untouchable as long as they paid off the cops. Lucas shuns excess, determines not to draw attention to himself, which is why he remains hidden for so long, and it’s only when, to satisfy his wife, he wears an outrageous fur outfit that he comes to the attention of Roberts.

As the tale zips along, in the background we witness the drugs industry at work, the packaging, the distribution, the clashes between rivals, the deaths of junkies (including a cop), and Vietnam, where corrupt soldiers have made possible Lucas’s clever scheme to buy drugs at the source, cutting out the middle man and ensuring the purity of the product.

But Lucas is a corporate hero. He believes in the brand. A brand, he says, is a guarantee of quality, its dissipation the cause of a dispute with mobster Nicky Barnes (Cuba Gooding Jr.). In the corporate drugs world, the Mafia might think it has drawn Lucas into its tentacles, but it’s the other way round.

This all climaxes in the most dangerous manner – cinematically speaking – possible. John Ford owns the doorway, has done since The Searchers (1956). Christopher Nolan has also taken a tilt at that particular cinematic crown in The Odyssey (2026) when the gates of Troy open to reveal the gigantic figure of Agamemnon in black shining armor. Here, the doors opening are those of a church. Lucas steps out to see the street deserted except for the waiting Roberts.

There are other standout scenes in a movie that careers along so fast it scarcely needs them – Roberts dressing a corpse up to look alive to escape a mob, the shock of the cops when Roberts hands in rather than shares out a million bucks, Lucas burning the fur coat in rage, any time corrupt Detective Trupo (Josh Brolin) appears the scene is a standout, Roberts begging corrupt cops for his money back, Lucas interrupting his breakfast to execute a rival in the street, even the meet-cute with Lucas’s future wife Eva (Lymari Nadel) “can you let go of my hand?”

Lucas dresses immaculately but conservatively, Roberts is in jeans but Tupo, in black leather coat, exudes power. There’s very little moralizing, although various people complain about the loss of an accepted order. The drug dealers go down but there’s no mention of imprisonment for the hordes of soldiers and airmen who took money to feed drugs to their own soldiers or ship them to America.

The cast is absolutely terrific, Denzel Washington (The Equalizer 3, 2023) a commanding, cunning, figure, Russell Crowe (Gladiator, 1999) with his shuffling walk, Chiwetel Ejiofor (Backrooms, 2026) and Josh Brolin (Weapons, 2025) as the most arrogant of the corrupt cops. Supporting roles are filled by the likes of John Hawkes (Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri, 2017) , Carla Gugino (Watchmen, 2009), Cuba Gooding Jr. (Jerry Maguire, 1996), Armand Assante (Blowtorch, 2016), Idris Elba (Heads of State, 2025) and Ruby Dee (A Thousand Words, 2012). Written by Steve Zaillian (The Irishman, 2019) based on an article by Mark Jacobson.

There’s one other stunning element that needs mentioning – the music by Marc Streitenfeld (Prometheus, 2012). This must be the most self-effacing score ever to grace a gangster picture.

If this has been made today, the trailers would be acclaiming the Oscar achievements of the actors – the tally comes to three winners and three nominees. Next year, when this is due a 20^th anni reissue maybe that will be the promotional tag.

I might well be tempted to watch it again tonight.

Bye, Bye, Braverman (1968) ***

Director Sidney Lumet didn’t have an easy time of it in the late 1960s. Like The Appointment (1969), this went missing in action. And you can see why. While The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (1947) was straightforward in mixing fantasy with reality, this is more tricksy – in a contemporary way. The fantasy elements verge so much on the realistic that it’s difficult at times to work out what is real.

And to add a bit of more substantial culture to the mix, there are shades of James Joyce, in the idea of someone going to a funeral and imagining their own death. And while there are actually a quartet of buddies in early middle age heading for the funeral of their friend, the titular Braverman, luckily there’s only one, Morroe Rieff (George Segal) who appears to live in his imagination.

Morroe makes a living working in public relations, his novels not sufficiently commercial. You don’t realize this at first because you think he’s the cop who’s had to bring the news of her husband’s death to his wife Inez (Jessica Walters). Then you might think that he and Inez have the hots for each other and literally the moment the road is clear, she’s jumping his bones. But it’s pretty clear, from the way his wife Etta (Zohra Lampert) is annoyed about him running to Inez’s side at the slightest emergency, that he’s got more (unrequited) interest in her than a married man should have.

That last is the trickier one. It seems like it could be real. After all, the husband was notorious for his philandering, while Inez has played the dutiful wife. But you soon realize that any time Morroe is outside the strict confines of talking to his mutinous girlfriend or with his pals, virtually every other scene he appears in is manufacture.

The other three are well-drawn. Their occupations are largely irrelevant, because in Seinfeld fashion what they actually mostly do is talk, and often about things that are as inconsequential as Seinfeld, and they bond over communal memory of even odder things.

Felix (Joseph Wiseman) is the pick, in part because he has the best lines. He tells his feckless son, “I wasn’t crazy about your mother, and I like you even less.” He refuses to get into a Volkswagen because he’s Jewish and the car was made in Germany.

So mostly what you’ve got is the kind of inconsequential chatter that a bunch of intellectuals will indulge in, some of it intellectual, some of it not. That’s just the kind of movie it is. And either you’re going to sit back and let it work, or you’re going to switch off early once you realize what type of picture it is.

There were a lot of movies back in the day that concentrated far more on dialog and character than story and moving a story along. In part this was due to Hollywood drawing far more on the talents of playwrights, when William Inge (Bus Riley’s Back in Town, 1965), Tennessee Williams (Night of the Iguana, 1964) and Arthur Miller (The Misfits, 1961) were considered marquee attractions. The kind of story-driven action picture that proliferated from the 1970s onwards didn’t exist to make spectacle more important than dialog or character.

Making up the quartet are Barnet Weinstein (Jack Warden) who sports a toupee that comes off in a crisis and Holly Levine (Sorrell Brooke) and they’re all past masters at niggling each other and trying to niggle out the meaning of life.

Getting to the funeral isn’t straightforward. Inez’s directions prove difficult to follow. There’s an interaction with a taxi driver (Godfrey Cambridge) and they turn up at the wrong funeral.

Sidney Lumet steers clear of the grandiose, he’s not trying to make any visual points, and the fantasy inserts take the place of the inner monolog of James Joyce.

But it’s all dialog, so be prepared.

George Segal (The Bridge at Remagen, 1968) almost reinvents his screen persona, Jack Warden (Blindfold, 1966) revels in a more outgoing less choleric character, but Joseph Wiseman (Dr No, 1962) steal the show. Look out for Jessica Walters (Number One, 1969) and Zohra Lampert (A Fine Madness, 1966).

Screenplay by Herbert Sargent, in his debut, from the novel by Wallace Markfield.

You can see why this has gone missing but if you know what you’re going into it’s worth a look.

I have my own copy but you can get a good flavor of it – the first hour at least – on YouTube.

Danger Has Two Faces (1967) ***

Doppelgangers don’t come any luckier. In this instance the swap is with a married billionaire. Cue you’d think for a romcom, especially if the wife has her own reasons for welcoming a replacement. Except this was made at the height of the espionage boom, so it’s quite a slick thriller, not a laff in sight.

The set-up is pretty good. Billionaire Mark Wainwright (Robert Lansing), emerging drunk from a West German pub, is mistaken by an East German thug for American spy Peter Murphy (Robert Lansing) who he’s chased through a secret passageway under the Berlin Wall. Murphy, wounded and exhausted, is mistakenly assumed by Mark’s chauffeur to be his boss and whisked off to a mansion to recover.

Mark’s wife, Eva (Dana Wynter), while her suspicions are alerted, has good reason not to give the game away. Her real husband, a playboy with no interest in business, was on the verge of signing away her family fortune. When the new Mark refuses to do so, she plays along, intrigued not so much by his job as by the fact that he is the opposite of her husband, kind and considerate.

Complications arise when Eva’s half-brother grows suspicious after his bid to take over the empire is thwarted, and when the East Germans express doubts that Peter was killed, tailing Eva and approaching the fake Mark, and when, as if often the case in these espionage pieces, Peter’s slippery boss Jack (Murray Hamilton) isn’t going to let him disappear quietly when having a billionaire provides the perfect cover for going anywhere in the world on a whim. There’s also the issue of who are the faces on the secret microfilm. And secret police swarming all over the place.

And, of course, of the doppelganger keeping up his disguise. Luckily, the original is a nasty, intemperate character so sudden rudeness can get him out any situation though drinking nine martinis without falling down drunk might be a bigger ask. Plus he’s a man “no government wants to offend.”

So enough complication to keep the movie rolling on, plus, as you might expect, incipient romance. It gets slightly episodic after this, involving helping a dissident escape East Germany and outing a Dutch spy.

While taken with the new Mark, Eva knows a) that his job comes first and b) it involves violence. She doesn’t want to take second place to his job and ain’t keen on shooting and fisticuffs.

But it takes a surprise turn in the third act when Jack instructs his agent to kill a 16-year-old boy who’s being blackmailed into revealing American spies. Rather than do that, the agent tries to go down a different route.

Robert Lansing is a new name to me, but then I’ve not seen Namu, the Killer Whale (1966). He’s got a brooding intensity that didn’t get him as far up the Hollywood ladder as you’d have thought. Dana Wynter I knew from Sink the Bismarck! (1960) but her movie roles had been scant.

Directed by John Newland (The Spy with My Face, 1965). Like The Man from Uncle features, this turns out to have been culled from a series, The Man Who Never Was, released in the US for television and abroad into cinemas.

Entertaining. While it might have been more entertaining as a rom com, it certainly works well enough for a thriller.

You can catch this on YouTube and minus the annoying ads.

The Driver (1978) ***

Blasphemy I know but I went to see this back in the day not because of director Walter Hill, certainly not for star Ryan O’Neal, but for the wonderfully edgy Bruce Dern (Smile, 1975). You never knew what Dern would do next. Even his hairstyles tended to be offkey. Without having the choleric demeanor of, say, Trevor Howard, he was never far short of exploding. Although he had a couple of top-billed roles, his position as an out-and-out leading man never took off and he was relegated to second male lead. But having him in your cast could transform a picture, especially if you let him off the lead.

My guess is that Walter Hill was aiming for the monosyllabic essence of a Clint Eastwood, Steve McQueen or Charles Bronson in casting the main role. But no matter how often Ryan O’Neal screws up his eyes or issues dialog through a sullen mouth he lacks the edginess his existential character requires, like those French guys Alain Delon or Jean-Paul Belmondo who were kings of edginess.

Instead, we’re stuck with O’Neal, and I don’t entirely blame the actor, he’s not always sappy, look at his work in The Thief Who Came to Dinner (1973). But the director does him no favors by failing to provide him not only with a background but any sense of a contemporary life – no partner, no kids – apart from a fondness for country music. Whatever he’s salting away his hefty earnings as a getaway driver for we never find out. So, unfortunately, bearing in mind O’Neal’s screen presence limitations, what we’re left with is a cipher.

All we know about the unnamed driver (Ryan O’Neal) is that he doesn’t like guns – and that proves to be a bit of a clever red herring. The unnamed detective (Bruce Dern) is much better value. Theoretically, he’s the good guy but back in the day cops had carte blanche to play the bad guy and this one decides to trap the driver by setting up his own bank robbery, planning to enrol the driver.

Into this mix comes “the player” (Isabelle Adjani – an actress who has a definite Gallic edge), a poker player, a kept woman, who happens to catch sight of the driver during a robbery at a small-time casino and then demands payment for not picking him out of a line-up. There is a smattering of burgeoning romance but you wouldn’t trust her not just to be after you for your wallet.

I’ve not mentioned the car chases, of which there are several. I’ve not mentioned them because they are all the same and except for ripping off a Lee Marvin scene from Point Blank (1967) lack the edginess and invention of the famous predecessors Bullitt (1968), The French Connection (1971), Fear Is the Key (1972) and any James Bond picture you care to mention. All the chases take place on the flat and maybe duke into the occasional alley but mostly stick to the main roads where tires can screech and let off sparks. And that’s it really. Once in a while someone has to duck to avoid bullets, but after the first chase, it’s basically repetition. Okay for the petrol-heads but a tad boring for the rest of us.

So back to the clever dick cop. Even by the standards of the rogue cop, the plot point seems imminently ridiculous. The detective is hiring a gang of robbers known to like using their guns to scare off any innocent bystanders. So what are the chances of that going wrong and some poor bank customer or employee being knocked off. Explain that to your employers, Mr. Detective. Trying to catch a getaway guy is not going to wash as the excuse.

Plus, of course, your clever plan relies on being able to get back the stolen dough. In those days, of course, you didn’t have to worry about the PTSD of anyone caught up in a violent robbery or think of compensating a bank for damage to property and some such and since this is Hollywood where all dreams come true, even one as barmy that that hatched by Walter Hill (he’s the screenwriter, too), you can just carry on regardless.

The best part of the picture is the non-vehicle getaway. The driver has to use a fence to get rid of the hot cash and is willing to trade it in at a substantial loss. This involves left luggage, keys, double crossing, the detective chasing down two sets of cash, the player, and a final stand-off.

Talking Pictures TV which has a habit of finding gold in old pictures out of circulation for a long time has this to view for free. I had wanted to check it out to correct my earlier estimation and for the pleasure of seeing Bruce Dern in one of his best roles. But I didn’t end up altering my opinion.

Bruce Dern steals the show. It’s worth comparing what little Isabelle Adjani (The Story of Adele H, 1975) does to what little Ryan O’Neal does. She wins hands down.

Walter Hill would go onto to win a certain regard among critics. But the only pictures of his I like undeservedly are Streets of Fire (1984) with another monosyllabic main character and 48 Hrs (1982) but the latter mainly because Eddie Murphy knocks spots off the monosyllabic sour Nick Nolte.

Worth a watch for all the wrong reasons. Not Walter Hill or car chases, but Bruce Dern and Isabelle Adjani.

By the way, Bruce Dern is a guest at this year’s Edinburgh Film Festival so we might get a showing of Silent Running (1972) or Smile (1975).

Supernova (2000) ***

Under-rated for sure but still light years ahead of such sci fi nonsense as The End of Oak St (2026). Doesn’t hang around either, story told in 82 minutes flat. And instead of wasting time and stretching credibility just comes straight out and says the crew on this space ship and the audience for that matter aren’t smart enough to understand even in pure mathematical terms what is going on in the ninth dimension, which is where the narrative threat comes from.

Plays around with the Alien series conceit of alien aboard a space ship but doesn’t require a toothy monster and doesn’t fall for that old canard of dropping what you’re doing and responding to a distress signal from outer space. For the simple reason that this is medivac operation, its purpose to rescue people in distress.

There’s some interesting stuff about evolution and quite a nice line about the human race being effectively composed of stardust gathered from the previous millions of years. And it’s gone truly hyper in terms of the threat – I mean Project Hail Mary (2026) level of threat. We’re not talking about invading Earth or blowing it up, what’s at stake from this item from the ninth dimension is our solar system as a blue giant (sun) or supernova intends to wipe out anything it perceives as a rival.

Given that our brains, as noted, are too small to conceive of such a concept, the main narrative concentrates on dealing with a refugee from a mining planet and his “treasure” worth billions, plus an “11-minute window” at the end of the tale for the crew to escape. The Nightingale space ship has performed what’s termed a “dimension-jump” which permits it in pure lightspeed style to cover 3,000 light years in a flash.

However, the ship’s captain dies during the jump and recovering drug addict Nick (James Spader) takes command. On board we’ve got Dr Kaela (Angela Bassett), lovers Danika (Robin Tunney) and Yerzy (Lou Diamond Phillips), and Benji (Wilson Cruz) who plays chess with computer control Sweetie. First hint of impending trouble is that Karl (Peter Facinelli), the fellow being rescued, was the abusive partner of Kaela. Then it turns out he’s Karl’s son. Then it turns out he’s actually Karl, grown younger and somewhat superhuman, a charmer, who manages to seduce Danika, though her lover doesn’t seem to mind, too entranced by the “treasure”, a spherical artefact containing the aforesaid ninth dimensional matter.

Nick wants to dump the treasure out the window. The ship’s got enough problems, having lost most of its fuel during the jump and liable to be incinerated in 17 hours by the blue giant which is sucking it into its high-gravity atmosphere.

Nick returns to the mining planet to find extra fuel supplies, not realizing this is a trap of Karl’s devising, allowing the invader to weaponize all manner of equipment against Nick. Meanwhile, Karl gets rid of Danika and Yerzy by the simple measure of ejecting them into space. He gets the better of Kaela and Benji. The best scene is Benji pleading with the computer to override its controls to deal with Karl, on the grounds that she’s done this once before to wake him up to play chess.

Naturally, Nick has a few tricks up his sleeve or the ending would be pre-ordained. Although you probably wouldn’t expect to see Nick and Kaela stuck in the same pod, buck naked, for the journey home. Whether they then exchange bodily fluids is unclear, but they do swap eye color.

There’s also an interesting kicker. If the artifact reacts with the blue giant, it will create a supernova which will reach Earth in 51 years and either destroy it or lead it into a new form of evolution.

This doesn’t have a good rep, mostly on account of the shenanigans relating to its shooting – more about that tomorrow – but I found it to be pretty serviceable. James Spader (Secretary, 2002) was always better when he could exude menace of sexual creepiness so playing the hero just doesn’t seem right. Peter Facinelli (Viper, 2026) exudes a Spader kind of menace – with a smile. Oscar-nominated Angela Basset (What’s Love Got To Do With It, 1993) ensured there was at least one class act aboard. Robin Tunney (End of Days, 1999) is landed with the overly-emotional scenes. Lou Diamond Philips (La Bamba, 1987) and Wilson Cruz, better known for television, are effective.

There was a whole hoohah surrounding the direction so I’m dealing with that tomorrow in a Behind the Scenes.

Much better than I expected.

The End of Oak St (2026) ** – Seen at the Cinema

Truly terrible. When your standout scene is two dinosaurs humping each other or having their snouts covered in ice cream or a slithosaurus slithering through a house your picture is in dire trouble. Basically, it’s like a random selection of Steven Spielberg offcuts – the dazzling overhead light from Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977), the kids cycling in E.T (1982), the heaps of dinosaur pooh from Jurassic Park (1993). Plus being trapped in a car and feral threats in the kitchen, also from Jurassic Park.

This feels like a sci fi B-movie from the 1950s when the plot comprises preposterous nonsense. I laughed out loud when I listened to the stars, clearly barely able to contain themselves when they had to do the exposition. A wormhole or a ripple in the universe had either transported a small town back 200 million years to the prehistoric period or the reverse, transported the prehistoric period complete with jungle and swamps to 1982.

And someone’s being trimming the budget. Once the dinosaurs go on the attack there’s barely a dozen people around for them to prey on, you’d have expected an entire feast awaiting them on the streets.

The cast are required to do little more than run and scream and the screenwriter little more than find ways of the cast getting in the way of the dinosaurs rather than doing their level best to hide. And there’s one of those dumb twists at the end to provide us with a happy ending, so that one of the stars, whose been munched by a dinosaur, can be reunited with his family.

The wormhole bounces around a bit, from house to house, garden to garden, for some reason. It’s this big wobbly ball and minus any of the sensible mumbo-jumbo analysis or assessment of other big-budget sci fi pictures this relies on someone deducing that if they jump into this big wobbly ball they’ll end up back where they came from.

Anne Hathaway has blown all the esteem she’s earned from this year’s The Devil Wears Prada 2 and The Odyssey and unless it was her heart’s desire to make the kind of picture that is cannon fodder for Netflix or Amazon rather than 20^th Century Fox it’s an awful decision. This is Ewan McGregor’s first picture since the low-budget Mother Couch (2023) and it’s not done him any favors unless a casting director is looking for someone who can run and scream and both at the same time.

Trying to fill out the story we have dissatisfied couple Denise (Anne Hathaway) and Greg (Ewan McGregor). She’s a budding writer, but her novel reveals that she’s desperate to leave husband and two kids. He’s lost his job but hasn’t told his wife, making ends meet by making pizza deliveries and he’s prone to secret nips of whisky.

Daughter Audrey (Maisy Stella) is a big fan of Carl Sagan and astronomy and can chip in with nonsensical mumbo-jumbo should the need arrive. Son Brian (Christian Convery) is being bullied by a bigger boy, but that’s because he broke the arm of the bigger boy’s younger brother, so not quite as straight-on a victim as he appears. And there’s a dog, improbably called Starbucks, which both goes missing and turns up as the narrative requires.

Apart from the slithosaurus and the dinosaurs shagging each other there’s nothing new here. The premise is as barmy as One Night Only (2026), so maybe studios believe they’ve dumbed down the movies sufficiently for audiences to accept the dumbest of plots.

Nobody comes out of this well, least of all uber-producer J.J. Abrams (Star Wars – Episode VII: The Force Awakens, 2015). Lazy rip-offs did not seem to fit into his portfolio.

Writer-director David Robert Mitchell made a splash with It Follows (2014) but doesn’t carry this off.

The best you can say is that maybe it will be candidate for the So-Bad-It’s-good subgenre.

Laughable.

The Vampire Lovers (1970) ***

Should have a lot more going for it. Female empowerment for a start. This would also, in today’s terms, be called a reboot of the Dracula legend, though it does originate from a different source than Bram Stoker. Or you could look at the bold exploration of lesbianism, none of the angst of The Killing of Sister George (1968) or the lyricism of The Fox (1967). Or you could fall back on that old chestnut – a camp reinterpretation of the vampire world, where female breasts rather than necks are the prime target. At the very least, it should have set up Ingrid Pitt (Where Eagles Dare, 1968) for stardom.

And while all these hold true, it lacks the key ingredient of the horror picture, any kind of tension or imminent threat. Nor does it carry the emotional weight of Countess Dracula (1971) – also starring Pitt – a twist on Dorian Gray, of a woman trying to hold age at bay with infusions of virgin blood.

So, in the end, it comes off as little more than a commercial decision to revive a fading genre with lashings of nudity, sex and lesbianism. Director Roy Ward Baker (Moon Zero Two, 1969) brings significant style to the proceedings even though the backdrops look as if they’ve been picked from a cast-off bin.

The tale is based on a story Carmilla by Sheridan Le Fanu, that predated Bram Stoker. On the production side, Hammer and its American rival AIP teamed up, with the latter blamed for insisting on the sexual overdose. Although on that score you could as easily point the finger at the British censor known for his liberal approach to such shenanigans.

While it’s true that Dracula, especially as interpreted by Christopher Lee in Hammer offerings, carried a sexual frisson, there was never anything more than that, allowing the audience to determine whether the vampire was ever interested in a woman except for the purpose of sucking blood from her neck. Previously, diaphanous gowns and cleavage had been the extent of the sexual element. To switch the target from the neck to the breasts is a determined commercial move.

So, basically, with a gender twist, we’re following the old story – vampire stalks victims, finds acolytes, and falls victim to a vampire hunter. In the 19^th century, the beautiful Carmilla (Ingrid Pitt), traveling with her mother, a countess (Dawn Adams), is adept at inveigling herself into high-class households where she seduces the daughters and staff of the rich. Her first victim Laura is niece to General Spielsdorf (Peter Cushing) who subsequently enlists the help of vampire hunter Baron Hartog (David Wilmer), who mistakenly believes he had rid the world of the female vampire clan.

Next for the bloody breast treatment is a Mademoiselle Perrodot (Kate O’Mara), governess to Emma (Madeleine Smith). Perrodot becomes her lover and accomplice. Carmilla is an inclusive kind of vampire and if need be will seduce any male obstacle such as Morton’s suspicious butler Renton (Harvey Hall) while sucking the blood out of any passing male of more modest means.

Carmilla has the same get-out-of-jail-free as any male of the species and can take refuge in her grave until the heat passes. However, this time she’s intent on taking Emma with her. By now Baron Hartog has filled the general in on the threat, explaining that the Karnstein clan go back to the sixteenth century, and that he has dispatched many of the breed in traditional fashion, decapitation or stake through the heart, but he had been unable to find the night-time resting place of Carmilla.

So when Carmilla heads off to Karnstein Castle with Emma, she’s not expecting vampire hunters lying in wait. This time it’s the general who does the killing, making doubly sure by both cutting off her head and driving a stake through her heart. Emma recovers.

Given that any version of Dracula was essentially a franchise, Hammer/AIP managed to keep the Karnsteins going for another two episodes, Lust for a Vampire (1971) – which gave Yutte Stensgaard a shot a stardom – and Twins of Evil (1972) starring Playboy Playmates the Collinson twins.

While The Vampire Lovers was a launching pad for Ingrid Pitt as a new top-billed femme fatale, her marquee attraction didn’t last beyond the superior Countess Dracula. However, Pitt certainly brings gusto to the part and there’s an argument that the contemporary world deserved more explicit expression of that previously restrained sexual frisson. The counter-argument is that it’s blatant sexploitation.

Kate O’Mara (The Horror of Frankenstein, 1970), a future Scream Queen, would have been an obvious contender for the main role rather than a supporting one except that she refused to take off her clothes. Madeleine Smith (Taste the Blood of Dracula, 1970) became another future Scream Queen.

With Ingrid Pitt’s physical allure to the fore that limited the involvement of Peter Cushing (Frankenstein Created Woman, 1967). The more prominent of the wannabes was Jon Finch (Macbeth, 1971).

Written by Tudor Gates (Danger: Diabolik, 1968).

Still the argument continues – groundbreaking approach to the genre or mere sexploitation.

You decide – Amazon Prime currently has this.